Win 'em with honey

With moving, whether across town or across the country, there comes the anxiety associated with things from switching your utilities to finding a good mechanic to deciding how to move (personal or moving company). Since I made my recent move, I've had the opportunity to see many people at their finest, while at the same time find a few chances for people to improve.

My car needed new tires, and now! I knew this, and was hoping to get the last of that trend before spending the time and money. Because I have warranties, I want to make it a "one stop shop" while getting my car serviced and anything else that might come up, so I went to the nearest Chevy garage to make an appointment. 

First question I asked was about the tires, to which I was informed that this particular dealer didn't do tires - they referred everything to a local tire store. While I found that a little odd, I remembered that I'm new to the area, and maybe there was more to the story, but at the time, I just wanted to check about tires. 

So I drove to the tire store and asked the lady at the desk about tires for my car. It appeared that I must have interrupted something good, because "service with a smile" was not coming. After looking up my tires and doing a bunch of calculations, she gave me a quote of over $800 for off-brand tires. I then explained, nicely, that I could find Goodyear tires for under $600 and (because they have this BIG Goodyear sign on their shop) to please look up the prices for Goodyear tires. The quote was over $750. That was when I made my polite exit. 

Later I researched Chevy garages and the only one that seemed to want to help was almost 100 miles away, but the quote for the tires was under $550, so I made an appointment, of course. Because this place was so far, I made plans to do other things while there - office shopping, seeing the step-granddaughters, get a few groceries, etc. And hoping that I could get the kid-time knocked out, I left early, thus allowing for time in case one of my tires went bad on the way (Murphy's Law, plans to get the tires, radial belt starting to go on one of the tires, just my luck). 

Well, kids were still taking a nap and the stores were on the other side of town, not leaving a comfortable window for shopping and getting to the service garage. So I pulled into the dealer an hour early to see if they could get a head start, which they "somewhat" did (the guys that would be working on my car were busy, but they were able to get the car on a lift and get a head start on it).

In the meanwhile, the kids' parents came and picked me up and we went for ice cream and a run through the park while Murphy's Law was still looming over me. One of the tires was messed up to and it couldn't be mounted on the wheel.

Only 3 new tires, 100 miles from home, not making for a good day. But the Service Manager came out and worked it out with me so that I can go back in a couple of days to get the fourth tire (the best of the old tires was put back onto the car for the time being) and because of this, she would give me that fourth tire at no cost. I consider this more than generous, and now they have my business!

There has been many other examples of "good opportunities gone bad", everything from phone service to which satellite or cable provider to go with to where I can get a good ice cream cone... people realizing that by performing a service they need to check attitudes at the door, because that guy asking a few questions, learning his way around town, and wanting to get a fair deal, can easily go down the road.

I try to be frugal, but I'm willing to give more when I get more. I try to shop local or regional, but I can see spending an extra $200, especially when my money seemed to be a bother. I understand that things happen, but a moment to try to make things right goes a long way.

Going into a business with a smile can be the best way to get what is needed. Returning the smile can be what is needed.

Small town, big city

I've been at my new church for a few weeks now. The parishioners have endured a couple of my sermons, and some even returned after hearing the first one. ;)
For the most part, the community has been inviting and caring, and seldom do I find a dissatisfied citizen. It's almost like a Stepford Wives movie.
The home here is large - I was told that it was 3200 square feet. But it seems difficult to find the room for much of the stuff that came out of a smaller home. I'm wondering if the space was measured before the walls were put in, and the walls themselves are a few feet in depth.
I've enjoyed many scenes around the region - rolling hills, wide open space, acres of open farmland. I could say that it has taken my breath away, but the heatwave has made it hard to breathe.

Yes, it may sound like I'm complaining about my new location, but I'm not. I could appear that I'm being pessimistic, but I'm not. You could think that I'm whining, but I'm not.

Life here is a good or as bad as one wants it to be. It's like that anywhere. Oberlin Kansas has all of the features of a small town as well as some opportunities that you'd find in a bigger city. And if there is something needed that Oberlin doesn't provide, there are a couple larger cities withing an hour's drive, and major cities within two to four hours.

A few people have asked if I would still taken this appointment if a couple of situations were different at the turn of the year. Rehashing those questions gives me a headache, but I can say that I can't come up with a good answer because some things were unknown to me until after I made a decision to have some conversations about new opportunities.
What I can say is that so far the people here are people, just like any other community. But I do believe that many take more pride in their town. The Community Band, the efforts to improve the swimming pool, the Community Center - all proof of that.

Amazed and awed

I survived my first Sunday preaching at my new churches. I made it to both places, and while preaching about diversity and change, I also managed to adapt and change.
Going from a "country church" that has the a/c pointed in a particular direction, hence the podium in the middle to the aisle, to another church that is so comfortable that I barely noticed any temperature variances, or from parking in a field to picking out a spot from one of the dozens to places around a building, or standing in front of a few people doing almost everything myself to preaching to a hundred people with a dozen folks helping in different ways (sound, video recording, music, singing, ushers, and greeters, just to name a few).

As I have said plenty of times, the people in this area are so great. They have been welcoming and inviting and open and courteous. Whenever something needs done, someone is responding to the need at a moment's notice.

Something that makes me nervous is time. While I've preached that "church doesn't have a closing time", I'm also a clock-watcher. I know that people make plans, and I'm just as guilty of worrying about the time on any given Sunday morning. Sure, so of it might come from my last parish where I had very limited time to get from one church to another, but I also dislike making other people's lives unbalanced.
With that being said, I found myself "sweating the small stuff" yesterday as the larger Worship Service ran about 70 minutes. Sure, there was Communion for 100 people, and there were some moments of grace when my Song Leader had to "point me in the right direction,", but still, the clock is on the wall for the reason. But no one said a word, other than a Relations Chairperson who talked with me about where to go to Sunday lunch and at what time (of course, if we get out later, we have to "rush" to the pizza buffet lines before other congregations - hahaha).

But after everything yesterday, as well as the comments I received at the "round table" this morning, I'm so amazed at the love the people are showing. Even this morning, the 70 minute service never came up - it was about my ability to recite the words for Communion, as well as doing the Service overall.

So I survived my first worship services here.
I hope the people survived me =)

Feeling the love

It is a slow process getting settled into my new appointment - not getting lost in town, trying to remember who is who, finding the right time to catch the lunch special at the Frontier, and of course, getting things put away in the house and office... rearranging or moving what was left behind, trying to remember what label meant what on each box, and the ultimate, navigating the new hallway in the dark.

But as stressful as all of that can be, the amount of love that I've felt since I moved here has been amazing. People meeting me or introducing me wherever I am, residents always greeting me with a kind "welcome to town", the folks in my churches going above and beyond to make sure that everything is taken care of. 

It has been seriously amazing!

To give you an idea of some of the caring of this community...

• I had to get an account going so that I can get paid (my church does an automatic transfer of my pay twice a month). Of course, The Bank (yeah, I typed it like that) has rules for opening the account, but because I'm still waiting on my last church to pay me, they let me open the account with just a few bucks. Sure, the fact that the branch manager is a member of my church and the President/CEO of The Bank happened to be in that day doesn't hurt my feelings any, but everyone there was so gracious in helping me get things taken care of.
• My uncle once said (and I've heard it from other clergy as well) that the first people that come rushing to greet you might be the first to push you out the door. I don't think that applies in this case. The first people to come greeting were there to take care of a couple of minor issues around the house. Sure, it was great that they want to take care of their property, but these were things that could have waited a day or two or three. But no, they wanted (and continue to want) to make sure that everything was taken care of so that I could be comfortable living here.
• People have quickly taken me in as "one of their own". I noticed that one of the "round table sessions" take place at the Frontier (The Frontier is a great cafe on one of the highways here), and the County Sheriff is a regular participant. I later stopped by the Sheriff's office to chat with him and find out about some of the in's and out's around the area. A day of two later, I stopped in at The Frontier again for breakfast and there was the Sheriff, welcoming me at the table. Since then, I've become "the game"... a couple of people will wait for choice folks to come in, see if they can get them riled up, and then introduce me at the new Reverend. I wonder if anyone keeps score on how fast a face might turn a little red or how much coffee is spit across the table. Also, if there isn't a "game", people who aren't even one of my church members will make it a point to introduce me to other folks. Again, they take me in as "one of their own".
• While walking around town yesterday during the Independence Day events here, I was wearing a church t-shirt that my secretary gave me (some years ago, a pastor here had church folks volunteering at the movie theater, and had shirts printed to help them stand out). Well, not wanting people to think that I was "passing through" or "just visiting", I wore the shirt. That simple act did, of course, make me more visible, but it also extended the opportunity for folks to come and introduce themselves or add their own "welcome!" My Bishop talks about us pastors being part of the community, but I think that the community wanted me to be a part of them. The only thing I can compare this to would be my first appointment ten years ago at Curtis. So many people said "hello" that I lost track.

Tomorrow I'm going to get up, drive along US 36 about five or six miles, turn up County Road 495 and drive that gravel road just over six miles, then hang a right at the "Prairie Chapel UMC" sign and give my first Message at the 9:00 Service as the pastor of this parish. I'm then doing to drive back to corner of Commercial and Cass to the Oberlin UMC and deliver the Message there at the 10:45 Service. I'll probably be as nervous, or more so, as I have been all week, but I'm sure that everything will be ok.

If you ever find yourself cruising along US 83 or 36, and you find the spot where the two intersect in northwest Kansas, stop by one the place here. I'm sure you won't be disappointed.

A decade of tears & cheers

I'm coming up on my ten year anniversary as a pastor, and the day will be marked by my official start at a new appointment in northwest Kansas.

Thinking back, I've had lot of ups and downs, shouts of joy and painful crying, celebratory hugs and sympathetic hugs.

I started out ten years ago with three funerals in my first two weeks - Opal, Carolyn, and Bob. Three saints that helped me cut my teeth, and fast.
In the funerals I've done, I can't escape the memories of Lela, a community matriarch, or Gary, known for his heroic actions before his death, or Gary, who had a goal of watching his daughter down the aisle no matter what it took, or Gladys, who died while going to help someone - something that she always did, or Harold, who no matter what differences he had, would still help someone if it was really needed, or Wade, who loved life and kept humor in everything, even if it meant taunting a teacher about football teams or clicking his wheelchair while a certain pastor was preaching.
This list is no way complete - it's only a piece of some of those who taught others about celebrating life to the fullest, all the way to the glory of God.

I've also shared in so many joys, such as the first baptism - his name is Logan, and it was on Sept 11, 2004. There was also the time I did an immersion baptism of three kids and the entire congregation coming to celebrate the event. There was also times when I was baptizing a child and parent, or siblings. There is even the time I baptized Rich, fourteen hours before he passed away.

Each wedding has been a joy in it's own self. The mom who had her children walk her down the aisle, or as I mentioned before, the dad who successfully walked his daughter down the aisle, or the couple who faced adversity to make their day an even more special one.

I've seen lots of love in my churches, and of course, there have been some downers - folks who have let anxiety or rumors or whatever demons get in the way of Kingdom-building. But love always prevails - the love of some colleagues who have helped me in some dark days, or the love shared with cancer fighters, or the love of my child in the congregation who has helped everyone remember what Christmas is all about.

Looking back, it's has been a long ten years, and a quick ten years. It has been a time of loving and caring, bearing one another's pains and sharing in our joys.

So here's to the next ten years, and the tears and cheers that it will bring.

And the sadness sets in...

This is crunch-week.
It's the final wire to packing, moving, unpacking, getting settled into a new community, and all while the wave of emotions topple me over. It's happening while I'm excited for a fresh start in a great area as the new pastor of a very country church and a larger city church; while I'm sad to depart from many terrific people and some that I can call good friends; while I'm overwhelmed with the headaches of packing, ensuring that the right stuff is packed appropriately and labeled correctly for the moving company; while answering the phone to various well-wishes and goodbyes.

I did get a chance to meet my new secretary last week. We had a great conversation, hopefully figured out a manageable relationship, and me seeing that this person likes to have a system so that everything gets done in a way to make her job easier.
I like that. It means that all I have to do is "fill in the blank and let her be". It means that I can spend some time getting settled in, visiting some folks, and getting things unpacked around the house and office.

I also got to meet the groundskeeper for the church, a very nice guy with a plan and the best way to get things done for all people involved. I'll hear from him when he needs access to my house or I'll see him go through the church to get to whatever he needs to the sprinklers, I'll see him when he's mowing and trimming, and other than that, as long as everything is done, we're all good.

As excited as I am, I'm also sad to depart from some great people. These are the people that I can truly say as made an impact for the good for my pastoral ministry.
There are always a couple of people like this, and as I think back over my ten years as a pastor, I can still tell you their names, their family, and somewhat more about them. In comparison, I sometimes forget my name.

I'm also sad to leave some people who are fairly new to the ministry I've had in Pierce & Osmond. I think back to the boy who spent over a year in the hospital after a transplant, only to have the transplant removed. Because of his extended stay, I had to do his baptism in his hospital room, and while every baptism is special to me in some way, his also had a unique twist to it. I'm also sad to leave a few kids who started coming to the Pierce church this past Fall and continued to come because, as their mom put it, "we like Rev Kev" (but I think they were more fond of my dog, Dingo). When they came to the Farewell Reception on my last Sunday afternoon, we must have hugged a dozen times.

There are also two or three couples who recently started to come to one of my churches, all with intentions of a future wedding there by some silly guy who they liked. In the short time that I got to know them, I've grown very fond of them and excited for the new lives ahead of them. I'm going to miss them.

And while all of this stuff is bouncing around in my head, I'm overwhelmed by the finished boxes, the partial, waiting to be filled, boxes, and the trash that has accumulated, compliments of the "well, maybe I really don't need to save this" concept that seems to be all so evident this week. Thank goodness that I can rent a dumpster from the city for a few days to make things easier for the garbage guys tomorrow.

All of this is sad, depressing, and can raise my anxiety to a Defcon 1. But I also have to pause and thank every single person who has been there for me, in the thick and the thin, in the easy and in the rough, in the down and in the joys.

So with a sad but thankful heart, I say "Blessings" as I go, and "Blessings" as I arrive.

Another chapter

I've been involved with public service since before I graduated high school. It started with being an Explorer Scout with the Pickerington Police & Fire Explorers, learning and taking part in various law enforcement and firefighting responsibilities. When I was in the US Air Force, I volunteer in different response jobs as well as being on a community Search and Rescue team. While I was in the Air Force, I took my first Emergency Medical Technician training, continuing the education all of these years. I've also been on a couple of volunteer fire departments on the past decade.
I don't mention these things to brag - I'm saying that I've worked for 35 years to do something that is about as dear to my heart as pastoring is... giving to help or assist others.

One things I've learned in my years is that the best teams get things done when everyone on the team, from the highest in command to the newest rookie, work as one unit, recognizing the gifts and talents and ideas of everyone, and when the command knows the limitation of everyone, especially themselves.
When people work as one, things can run like a well-oiled machine. When someone ignores the links of the chain (bottom and top) time, money, and resources become stretched and can (and many times will) break.

Sure, I understand that people want to help, and it can be frustrating when one is waiting for information to be passed along, but as with just about every emergency, a team cannot go in until they know what's going on. A dispatcher gets as much information before rolling the crews. A hazardous material response team won't go into an area until they have all the details - including the temperature, wind direction & speed, and sometimes humidity and water level. You might even take note that the haz-mat team won't go into certain areas until they stop, get all of the information, suit up for the necessary conditions, and then team-up again.

Over the past few years, I've had the opportunity to be part of different emergency groups to provide assistance, but I also have come to realize that as the responder rule goes - You have to take care of yourself first before you can care for others - I have to reevaluate my roles. Positions I've held as caused me to look again and command structures as well as the ability of others to listen and assist instead of "trying to be in charge".

As I turn a new chapter in my life - taking a new pastoral appointment and moving to a somewhat new region, it's time to do what *I* have to do. I know my abilities and limitations, and I know when to stay out of danger. So it's time to step back from the fire.